It's been an interesting feeling - this time in my life - and I don't think it's just because I'm now in my 30s. A lot of changes have happened, milestones have been reached. Reflection is inevitable when you hit all these times in your life. Thirty for me was interesting. I felt good and it was more surreal. I also had a slight "freak out" "life crisis" time and colored my hair, which I hadn't done in nine years! I remember twenty-five being really hard. I was pregnant Ami and I remember it hitting me hard. But this time it's different, and I don't think its simply because of my birthday. My middle, and my only daughter, is getting ready to start kindergarten. I already know I'm going to be mess, more of a mess than I was with my oldest. My littlest one is slowly exiting the baby stage and THAT is really hard. I think I haven't pushed him through all the normal stages of life that I would have with my others. It means he really isn't a baby and I don't know how I feel about that. It's clear from one of my most read posts, "When Do you Know" that how I feel about no longer having babies around isn't something that I think will go away. I'm conflicted because I don't know if what I'm feeling that way because that's just who I am, or if I really feel like I'm supposed to have more. I keep saying that I feel like I should have one more. But will I really feel done after that? When you pray for direction how do you know when the door is shut and God is telling you no? Is it making a sound financial decision like a door being closed? Or not....
look at these three goobers, getting so big!
This weekend was fabulous though. I went out with seven of my girlfriends to the cheescake factory. Oh my gosh, we laughed so hard! Not everyone knew each other, but it was like a large group of girlfriends that had known each other for a long time. I am so lucky to have all these girls in my life here. So darn lucky! The next day hubby made us chocolate chip pancakes and bacon, and we ate it out on the deck. It was a beautiful day and there I was with my cute little family. I felt so blessed. On my actual birthday we went out with another couple (one of my girlfriends whose bday is the day before mine) and we saw "The Other Woman".
It was a great weekend and the start to a great year of being 31, officially in my 30s and feeling good.